My all time, number one belief of what really is THE BEST quality to bring to a relationships is… drum roll please…. the ability to be able to ‘own your own stuff’!!!! By this I mean acknowledging within any relationship that everything that happens to you is about you. This stops the blame game! It also prevents falling into the victim role and enables relationships to be authentic, conscious and non reactionary.
If this is a new concept to you, one way to start to ‘own your stuff’ is to choose what you focus on. If you find you are focusing on something negative and find that your buttons are being pushed take some time to work out why your button is being pushed. It could be that you are reacting to something that has not been healed from your past. It could be a regular pattern on the same topic that requires you to own it, explore it, change it and/or heal it.
Buttons being pushed is another expression for having emotional reactions that seem at the time to be incontrollable. They are instant gauges to you that something is hitting a raw nerve.
By taking the time to see what buttons are being pushed and by taking the time to really own these buttons as being yours, you are bringing authenticity into your relationships. You are conscious of your relationship issues and working towards a more peaceful and harmonious life together.
Any buttons being pushed are unique to you and are based on your past experiences. It is not your partner’s responsibility for your buttons. Sure, they can be considerate of your raw nerves however how you react and how you heal is your responsibility. By taking the time to heal your past and reduce the number of buttons being pushed will result in a much more peaceful, harmonious and loving relationship.
And if you need with healing your reactions, please contact me to arrange for some coaching. Setting yourself free of automatic reactions, having the ability to own your own stuff, explore it and heal it is so very, very freeing. Go on, get onto the band wagon of true authentic freedom. Only you can do it. Decide today, once and for all to own your stuff, make the change and be exactly who you are to be. A beautiful, happy, loving, kind, fabulous, gentle, powerful and dynamic you.
Yours in love, Jane